UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Hippo gnu deer
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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