I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
