I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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