I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Randomize
