He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
