D3 body, D1 cock
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
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