your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
