Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Don't EVER smell your tampon
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
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