I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
