You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize
