ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
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