All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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