We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
