Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
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