I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
