I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
