Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize
