She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
