he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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