I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
