She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Vodka?
Forever.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize