I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
how can u be prego again
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
