So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
