we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize