One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize