NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
