Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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