I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize