It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize