Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
