new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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