highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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