Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Randomize
