Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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