if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Randomize