Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize