You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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