I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Randomize
