dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize