around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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