Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Just invented taco cereal.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
