Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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