When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
