this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Randomize
