she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Randomize
