I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Farmville is her only friend.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
