I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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