Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Randomize
