i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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