My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
