too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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