I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
